What people think about you is irrelevant to your growth as a person.

Once upon a time, my team of young employees thought I had a crush on a direct report. I ought to have been mortified by their tongue-in-cheek remarks and the knowing snickering that followed.

I was in the middle of really committing to feeling better about myself. To obtaining real bonafide self-confidence. And I made a promise to myself to give *everything* a shot, to experiment to death.. because I needed to figure out how to make my experience in corporate more bearable if I was going to stay on this career path.

I remembered how much more confident I felt when I was thinner and younger. A fresh face completely made up with eyeliner, highlighter, and thick black mascara. I had never really been secure in myself - not like what I experience today - but I figured feeling good at least started with my physical appearance.

So I started to come into the office with a full face of makeup. The whole process took me almost 90 minutes every morning. And it just so happened that training my direct report to take on more senior responsibilities was starting up at the same time.

It *did* occur to me that people would judge. But for the first time in my life, my commitment to myself was more important than the unfavorable opinions of others.

So I let them laugh at me. I let them make their jokes and interpret my actions and be entertained by their own perceptions. I let them think what they wanted to think, and I made very little effort to defend my behavior or deny their conclusions.

What people think about you is irrelevant to your growth as a person. If you’re surrounded by folks who would rather undermine and disrespect you, or see the worst in you… it’s time to leave. You’ll never win someone over who’s decided to think what they want to think about you, and that includes your boss, your team, or your company.

I quit the makeup thing after a few weeks. The effort was high and the result was minimal at best. And that’s what happens when you try to find answers by going back to who you used to be.

But here’s the lesson: it’s going to look the way it looks. What about it matters to you most?